Posted tagged ‘love’

An Endorsement for Addiction

January 27, 2009

One great thing to come out of all this recession business is that it gives me a chance to reasses some pretty big questions I was answering via default. If who I am is totally dependent on what I have, what I drive, all my stuff, my status at work, etc. – then who does that make me when that stuff is all gone? Ah, the big question. How do we appreciate and love the material stuff in our life without making it the purpose of life?

I was having coffee a few weeks ago on a lazy Sunday afternoon with my girlfriends. As we were chatting I noticed a big art piece in the display window (for those of you in L.A. I believe it was Modern Living on Beverly). It was one of those kind of pop art looking pieces that only has words, in the same font but different sizes and only in black and white. But I loved the quote, so I wrote it down. I think this speaks to one of the important aspects of life – the company we keep. And who we surround ourselves with can be totally recession-proof. It’s an addiction I’m willing to foster.

“Spending a lot of time at home with your love, family or friends can prove to be an extraordinary and delicious addiction.”





July 19, 2008

When I started college in the Fall of 1999 – I had to idea that my journey towards earning a college degree would end nine years later. Yep, nine years. And I’m not a doctor! That’s just your standard Bachelors. The journey included changing colleges, taking several semesters off to travel, a major change to take advantage of a study abroad in Austria, my most beloved brother’s near death car accident, a beautiful – joy of my life – precious niece, three weddings, three divorces, leaving behind a lifelong religion, countless jobs, a Labrador baby, late nights, trips to Starbucks, overdrawn bank statements, frustration, love and joy.

So you can imagine my emotion yesterday when, walking into my building at the end of a long work day, I saw a package – “DO NOT BEND – DIPLOMA INSIDE.” I screamed. Literally screamed, and jumped up and down, over and over, and over. I’ve already taken it to work and copied it and scanned it – just so I have back up proof it’s mine, that I earned it, that I’m a graduate.


And tonight, writing this blog, and looking over at my diploma, I have become overwhelmed with gratitude and love. Yes – I worked hard for that piece of paper. I did. But it was only possible because of the most amazing and loving friends and family. So this is actually a testament to them – to their help – to their support. And like a drawn out Oscar speech you want to play off the podium, I have to say thank you.


To my mom- I love you with all my heart. You are the most amazing woman, the best mom, and the biggest blessing. Without your emotional and financial help I couldn’t have done it. You have always set such a beautiful example of living what you preach. Thank you – I love you.


To my little bear – You’ll never read this, because I can’t share it with you now, but even though our marriage is over, I am so grateful to have had you in my life. You were such a motivator, such a supporter of me and my goals, always pushing me, usually pissing me off, to finish. Just finish. For your support and significant financial contributions, thank you. Maybe it’s not appropriate anymore – but I love you. I’ll always love you. Even though I had to leave – thank you.


To my sister and brothers – thank you for your love and support. I always wanted to be both a good sissy and a good example. Thank you for being there for me, for encouraging me and for celebrating with me.


To my Dad- you were instrumental in getting me to Austria, and I’m very thankful for that. Even though the past few years have been rough for us, and I wish you would’ve come to my graduation, I understand that your support and encouragement and love helped me get through a lot, especially at the beginning.


And finally to Regan, who was there for so much of this journey, no for this whole journey, from the halls of BYU to the transfer to a more sane environment, the crazy college break for the Olympics, the letters and emails when I was in Austria, for supporting and knowing the bore and chore the daily homework and struggles were sometimes – thank you. You are so beautiful, I love you so much, and I am so excited, and so not surprised we both got our diplomas at the same time.


But unlike the package, saying “Do Not Bend,” my thought today is about the wisdom of flexibility. It comes from a translation of the Tao Teh Ching.



Bend and you will be whole.

Curl and you will be straight.

Keep empty and you will be filled.

Grow old and you will be renewed.

Have little and you will gain.

Have much and you will be confused.

Therefore, the Sage embraces the One,

And becomes a Pattern to all under Heaven.

He does not make a show of himself,

Hence he shines;

Does not justify himself,

Hence he becomes known;

Does not boast of his ability,

Hence he gets credit;

Does not brandish his success,

Hence he endures;

Does not compete with anyone,

Hence no one can compete with him.

Indeed, the ancient saying: “Bend and you will remain whole” is no idle word.

Nay, if you have really attained wholeness, everything will flock to you.”